Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Awareness and Accountability
I went to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting yesterday and received my one-year keychain. I have been clean from drugs over one year now. This is a great time. It is also a dangerous time. Too much self-congratulation can be hazardous to one's sobriety. I almost had a relapse on my trip to Maine, but I told my friends I was an addict, and they kept me away from using. I try to remain humble, vigilant, and aware. I have to take stock of my situation every day, or I risk slipping back into old behaviors. I find the HALT system works well for me; I am constantly checking to see if I feel Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. These are the basic triggers for a relapse. The other triggers usually come from these four feelings. I am optimistic about my future for the first time in years. I now have the tools to stay clean. I just have to keep using them. Also, writing in this blog helps me. By putting it out there in writing, it makes it easier for me to be accountable to myself and my readers.